Bradbury's Jar 318

This is the back-up Bradbury's Jar. Each week, members post a response to a given prompt.
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ElectricWhite
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Bradbury's Jar 318

Post by ElectricWhite » Sun Jan 28, 2018 5:18 pm

Error 503 messages and Russian Spambots...what can I say? It's all a big ball of

Frustration

Feel free to vent here!
The only thing Flat Earthers have to fear is sphere itself.

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GrumpyGhostOwl
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Re: Bradbury's Jar 318

Post by GrumpyGhostOwl » Sun Jan 28, 2018 11:30 pm

“It’s for your own good,” he said.

There was no reply.

“I know I don’t usually do this, but I don’t see how it’s any different from the last time.”

There was a long, drawn out sigh.

“All you have to do is open your mouth.”

Silence.

“You put worse things than this in there all the time!”



“It isn’t as though I’m enjoying it, y’know.”

“Hmph!”

“Finally! It has something to say! Come on…”

Another exhalation of breath.

“This is just turning into an exercise in frustration, isn’t it? What’s with you, anyway?”

“Keyop,” Anderson said, “you have to use the prompt.”

Keyop turned around to address his mentor, who had walked up behind him. “The prompt?”

Anderson stepped up to stand beside the youngest member of G-Force, he held up a hand, fingers and thumb together, then opened the hand to imitate a pair of jaws opening. “Open,” he said.

Orion opened his mouth and Keyop moved quickly to shove the de-worming pill down the dog’s gullet.

Orion swallowed, then looked hopefully at Keyop, who followed up with a dog biscuit.

“Now go and wash your hands,” Anderson said.
Never trust an atom: they make up everything.

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ElectricWhite
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Re: Bradbury's Jar 318

Post by ElectricWhite » Mon Feb 05, 2018 8:02 pm

"It's amazing how much the frustration levels rise whenever their collective IQ goes up a half-point." ElectricWhite grumbled as she glared at the cell door and, presumably, the Spectran guards on the other side. She, as well as KT1972, Mark, and Jason had been captured in the latest skirmish over Gatchamania.net.

Jason removed a mangled drill bit from his cable gun. "No go, Skipper," he said, "it looks like they've got a new alloy."

"Are you going to use explosives, then?" KT asked.

"The cell's too small." Mark replied, "The concussion would cause too many serious injuries."

"And giving the door dirty looks won't help, either." Jason said to EW, who ignored him.

KT paced nervously around the cell which had barely enough room for two people, let alone three standing and a fourth in a wheelchair. "Oh, I'm sorry!" she suddenly cried. "Are you okay?" she placed a hand on EW's shoulder.

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?"

"I just stepped on your foot. Didn't you feel it?"

"You stepped on my prosthetic."

"Prosthetic?!" the two G-Force members cried in unison.

"Yeah." EW replied as she lifted the hem of her long black skirt and held out her left leg. Above her shoe was a 10 centimeter thick rod where an ankle should be. "I've had it for a couple years now."

"You hide it well." Mark said. Jason and KT nodded in agreement.

"Thanks. I really don't try to hide it..." EW paused and her eyes grew wide for just a moment. "I think I've got an idea..."


The relative calm of the cell block was shattered by a piercing scream and someone shouting, "Somebody help us! Please!"

To the cellmates, it seemed like an eternity before a guard came bursting through the door. He quickly scanned the room. A tipped-over wheelchair was in the far corner, a wheel slowly and uselessly spun in the air. Its occupant was on the floor, sobbing. The other Earth female cradled her.

"Don't just stand there!" KT snapped, "DO SOMETHING!"

"What happened?"

"OH GOD, IT HURTS!" EW shrieked, "OH, PLEASE, GOD! IT'S HORRIBLE!"

"What happened!" the guard bellowed.

"He ripped my leg clean off!" EW howled. She exposed her left leg just enough for the guard to see that, below her knee, was nothing.

The guard let out a startled yelp.

"What the hell's going on?!" a second guard tried to shout over EW's caterwauling. He then noticed EW's leg and screeched, "Who the hell did that?!"

"The Condor!" KT replied, "And his friend in white held her down while he did it!"

"Why didn't you stop them?" the second guard demanded.

"I tried! In case you haven't noticed, we aren't the sleek killing machines you are!"

"You hear that?" the first guard said with a big, dumb grin, "They think we're killing machines!"

Just then Mark and Jason dropped from the ceiling and promptly knocked out the guards.

"And the Oscar goes to..." KT heard EW mutter as she retrieved her artificial leg from under the wheelchair.

"What took you two so long?" KT asked once the guards had finished letting out the last groans before going completely unconscious, "Were you painting a miniature version of the Sistine Chapel?"

"We were just so taken by your performance..." Jason said.

"First off, I'd like to thank the Academy..." EW finished putting on her leg and then struggled to right her wheelchair.

"Would you like some help, EW?" Mark asked.

"Yes, if you would, please." she answered.

"We'd better hurry," Jason said, "these two aren't going to be out for long."
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Re: Bradbury's Jar 318

Post by GrumpyGhostOwl » Tue Feb 06, 2018 10:50 am

"This way!" Princess called.

Mark, Jason, ElectricWhite and KT1972 skidded around the corner and stopped next to Princess, Tiny and Keyop.

Keyop was sitting cross-legged on the ground, working on slimline laptop.

"I take it you have a plan," EW said.

"You take it correctly," Princess said. "How are you going with that code, Keyop?"

"G...getting... there!" Keyop stuttered. He was wearing a hoodie over his t-shirt, upon which was printed the legend, 'Cowboy Bebop.'

"It's a visual joke," Tiny explained in response to KT's look.

"I get that, yeah," KT said. "All you need now is a corgi."

"All we got is a St Bernard," Tiny said with a shrug.

"It's the frustration that comes with not being able to pursue a career in stand-up comedy, isn't it?" KT speculated.

"Here they come!" Princess hissed. "Keyop, I need that code now!"

Keyop pulled a shining length of html code from the computer and threw it like a fisherman's net. It landed on the floor in front of the goons, who were unable to stop in time.

With a shriek of horror, both goons were swallowed up by the code.

"Was that... a virus?" EW asked.

"It's a link," Princess explained. "Go take a look, but don't touch it."

EW wheeled her chair over to the luminscent code. It displayed as glowing blue underlined text which read, 'Honest Trailers - Youtube.com.'

"That's... that's brilliant," EW said. "It'll take them forever to get out of there. At least, it will if you set the default to autoplay."

"Course... I did!" Keyop declared.

Jason had walked over to stand beside the wheelchair. "Yeah, but what if they see the Pacific Rim trailer and it gives them ideas?"

"Pfeh," KT said. "They already do giant robots. They'll just paint it pink and disguise it as a kaiju and you'll blow it up like you always do."

"She has a point," Mark said. "I think we're pretty safe for now."

"In the meantime," Jason pointed out, "we have two Spectra goons loose on Youtube."

"Yeah," Mark said, "but once they encounter a few trolls in the comments, they'll come back."

"And in the meantime," Princess said, crouching down next to the hyperlink and carefully picking it up by one edge, "we simply roll this guy up." She demonstrated. "Then we put this back in a cell, and when they come back..."

Jason's grin was not something most sane people would like to have directed at them. "If I didn't think of you as a sister, I'd kiss you," he said.

"Let's keep it that way," Mark said with a warning glare at Jason.
Never trust an atom: they make up everything.

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ElectricWhite
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Re: Bradbury's Jar 318

Post by ElectricWhite » Tue Feb 06, 2018 12:26 pm

GGO -- :lol:
The only thing Flat Earthers have to fear is sphere itself.

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